What if ...

I don't get into law school?

I'm minorly freaking out, and listening to Glee mash-ups on repeat.

I KNOW there are alternatives to law school. Many of which I have pondered. And I always think OK I can do xyz ... but when I think about not getting in, I still freak out.

Yet, I freak out when I think about applying and the golden handcuffs. When will I not freak out?

But there's no point in freaking out now. I guess I should cross that bridge when I get to it. It's about as useful as freaking out every time I get into my car that I will get into an accident. You can't control who's out there on the roads - you can be careful but there's no guarantees. I can do the best with my applications as I can (and let's face it, the most important parts, GPA and LSATs, are already done with) but I can't make any guarantees after I hit submit.

All I can do is proofread proofread proofread and keep on breathing. And one more listen of Singin' in the Rain/Umbrella mash-up can't hurt.

Mish-mash

1. So I desperately want to finish up my 100 Favorite Things. However, a lot of that involves dragging out the camera to take pictures, and y'all know I'm really lazy. I need to start just taking pictures of everything so I always have a stash, eh?

2. I am recognizing more and more that I have control issues. As in, I prefer greatly when things go my way. I feel like this has developed over time, because I don't remember feeling this way even up til a few years ago. But the main thing is that I've developed control issues over the cleanliness of my apartment. Is that weird? Any tips on dealing with that because sometimes I feel like Francine in that episode of Arthur when she gets so angry that her head just blows off and flies into outer space? Anyone? Couldn't find a visual aid, but I bet the episode is up there on Youtube ... now if only I could remember which one it is.

But I don't want that to happen, even metaphorically. Any tips on how not to lose your head over a dirty apartment??

3. Twitter is only slightly taking over my life. I follow so many people that there is always a constant number of updates! I need to close the tab on my internet browser and only check it periodically. Otherwise I'm constantly looking at it!

4. Thanksgiving break is SO CLOSE. Shout out to my New Orleans homies, yo.

Thanks, Shelby, I stole this from your Facebook. And thanks, Hannah, for so many Thanksgiving memories. All I had to say then, and all I still have to say now is - there are so many arms in this picture!

I can't wait to eat lots of side dishes and pies (because those are my fave parts of the meal) and watch copious amounts of Bravo and read for pleasure! Oh man, I love breaks.

I am moving to Singapore ...

... not really. But if everything else fails (no grad school, no job, no husband [not that I would get one in the next year but whatever]), I will.

Because chewing gum in Singapore is ILLEGAL.

Hallelujah!

See - no joke. Singapore does it right, yo.

I like...

I like apples and peanut butter.
I like chocolate chips and peanut butter.
I guess peanut butter's OK, too.
I like gchat.
I like daydreaming about the future.
I like living in the moment.
I like black coffee.
I like jeggings.
I like to-do lists (and crossing things off!).
I like removing the lint from the dryer.
I like laughing.
I like blogging.
I like you!

I have a lot to do (not to out-busy anyone, but hey, I am a little concerned about my workload this week) and yet I decided to post to you lovelies instead. Because that is how stoopid I am.

OK. I am scared. Just putting it out there. I'm scared of the future. I'm scared of tomorrow and a year from now. I'm scared that I'm not good enough, that I'm not smart enough, that I'm too shy, that I cry too easily. I'm scared that I don't know what I want, and if I ever figure it out that I won't get it. I'm scared that I will want the wrong things, if that's even possible. I'm scared that I'll waste potential.

I am SCARED of the Tickler, but who isn't?

But you know, the Tickler can come and touch my leg and that would be terrifying but it doesn't help the fact that I'm scared about more important things, ya know?

I'm scared that I won't cross the things off on my life list. Of which there are like three things, but they're all very important.

I'm scared that no one is reading this. But this is really just for me, anyway.

I'm scared that I'm not a good friend. They do a lot for me, but I'm scared that when they need me (which some of them do) that I'll be scared to tell them I'm here and I'll listen.

I'm scared. But I know that I can do the hard stuff. I've just been slacking, which has got to stop RIGHT THIS INSTANT. Well, right after I finish this mocha, and put my laundry in the dryer.

I would end this with something cheesy but hasn't this been cheese enough? So anyway, this is a picture I found on my computer -- I look stupid but that is my kitty who I adore and whose leg is not going to be removed! Thank goodness, because I would love my three-legged cat but still, it would make me uncomfortable.

Love your cat, love yourself. - Anonymous

I don't know if that's a real quote or not, but I'm going with it here. Peace.